A New Life Begins
by darkangelrises
Summary: It has been a month since the Cullen's left... Edward left Bella alone with nothing but a broken heart. However, he left something behind that will change Bella's life forever. She may be able to keep a piece of her only love, Edward, in a way that no one thought possible. All characters and general story lines belong to the the rightful owner, Stephanie Meyers.
1. Chapter 1

**_*All characters belong to Stephanie Meyers*_**

 **CHAPTER 1:**

It's been a month since the Cullen's left… Left me so alone. The pain in my chest that roars through me every time I think of _him,_ has turned me into someone I do not recognize. There is nothing left of me, nothing holding me to this planet anymore. It's like the whole world has gone black, I can't see, I can't breathe, I can't exist without them. They are the reason that I existed, _he_ is the reason I could call myself human. Edward always told me told me to hold onto my humanity, not to give it up, but he took it with him. I am an empty shell of a person, nothing inside of me.

I know Charlie is worried. He every so often opens my door lightly and looks in, but doesn't say anything. What do you say to your catatonic daughter? I know he wants to be here for me but he doesn't know how. He does everything he can, but it can't pull me out of this nightmare. He brings me food, and when it gets cold he comes and takes it away. He is trying his best, and that's all I can ask. I wish I could be more for him, be the daughter he deserves. He deserves so much more than this.

A light knock on my door, shakes me from my thoughts. I don't say anything, I don't turn around to see who is there. I assume it is Charlie, bringing me another meal that I refuse to eat.

I hear the door creaks open as the person steps in the room, understanding that they won't get an answer from me. They slowly walk over to where I am sitting in the rocking chair next to my window, laying a hand on my shoulder.

"Honey…" A female's voice says. Shocked, I look up and see my mother looking down at me, worry creeping into every part of her face.

My mouth drops open like I am going to say something, but I quickly snap it shut because I know nothing is going to come out. I manage to look at her quizzically, as if saying " _What are you doing here?"_

"Charlie called, he said you needed me." She says softly, almost a whisper. She crouches down so that she is eye level with me. "Sweetie, I am _so_ sorry. I know how it can feel to lose someone very important to you."

Try the most important person in your life.

"Please talk to me, Bella. Please…" She begs.

Tears well up in my eyes before slowly dripping down my face. I hate letting people see me cry, but this is unavoidable.

"Oh, Bella!" she exclaims, pulling into a tight embrace. A loud sob comes ripping out of me as I bury my face in her hair.

"I miss him, mom." I sob, my voice coming out closer to a croak than my normal voice. It's been at least a week since I have spoken.

"I know, I know. I'm so sorry." She pulls me even closer.

We stay like this for several minutes until my sobs become quiet whimpers, then slowly die off leaving me empty. I always feel so empty after I cry, like there is nothing left in me.

She pull away from me, and looks at me before gasping. "Honey! You're so skinny!"

I let out a humorless laugh, then turn to look out the window.

She pulls on my arm, "Bella, get up. We are going to get you some food."

"No." I mumble.

She pulls harder, this time pulling me successfully forward. "Bella, I am not asking you. You are my daughter, and you will _not_ starve. Now, get up before I drag you by your hair."

I groan, but slowly pull myself to my feet. My mother is much more pushy than Charlie; she won't stop until she gets what she wants. I guess that is where I got my stubbornness from.

"Atta girl!" She says, very proud of herself. "Now, get your butt down stairs while I get you some food.

I roll my eyes, and do what she says heading down stair to the kitchen. No way around it, she will force feed me if necessary.

After my mother fixes me a gourmet peanut butter and jelly sandwich, she pulls me to the couch and throws on a movie. She says that I need to get back to the Bella she knows and loves, because catatonic Bella just won't due. I hope she is happy with disappointment, because _that_ Bella is long gone, never to return. However, she does get me talking which is more than I can say about Charlie… I can't get away with being the normal depressed self when she is around.

She puts on some comedy in hopes to get me laughing, but I tuned it out the moment the beginning titles started. I knew that it wouldn't help me by watching some dumb comedy, nothing can bring me out of this darkness. Net even guys accidently hitting each other in highly choreographed situations. My mother on the other hand was cracking up, temporarily forgetting that I am sitting here not laughing. She has a very contagious laughter, and normally just the sound of her laugh would have me rolling, but like I said, I am no longer the Bella that she knew. That Bella doesn't exist anymore.

It is getting near the end of the movie when I start to feel a little funny, my stomach churning. I instinctively put my hands over my stomach at the sudden pain that is now making me feel nauseous. My mouth fills with saliva, and I automatically recognize the the salty taste in my mouth. Oh god! I am going to throw up.

I quickly jump up and run to the bathroom right down the hallway, and began retching into the basin of the toilet. My sandwich coming back the way it came, not tasting as good as it did before. I am glad I turned down the tuna fish sandwich. After I am done dry heaving into the toilet, I grab the hand towel and quickly wipe my face.

"Bella?!" My mother calls running to the bathroom. "Are you throwing up?"

She throws the bathroom door open as I moan, "Uh huh."

"Oh goodness… Maybe that was too big of a meal for your first in a while." She muses and she begins to pull my hair back into a loose ponytail.

"Yeah, probably." I say. She is right, it was too hard on my stomach.

"Is there anything that you want me to get you? Ginger ale?" She asks, rubbing my back lightly as I lean against the sink.

"Do we have ginger ale?" I ask.

"No, but I don't mind running to the store to get some."

"No, no. It's fine, I don't need it."

"No honey, it's no problem. I'm going to run to the market and get some and some saltines. Their good for upset stomachs." She says. "I used to eat them all the time when I was pregnant with you. Morning sickness is a bitch."

I nod. "Okay, I am just going to brush my teeth and clean up."

"Okay, I be back soon. You okay by yourself?"

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Okay, I'll be back." She says as she turns to leave the house. She yells, "Is it okay if I take your truck?"

"Yeah, Mom!" I answer.

I hear her grab the keys and her purse and she quickly exits the house. I open my cabinet to grab my toothbrush and toothpaste when I have to move my box of tampon out of the way to reach them.

Huh.

I haven't had my period this month yet, I'm late. That's strange, I am never late. It's like clockwork, every four weeks, never a minute late. Then again, I have been through some recent trauma, and that can cause your period to be late. I shrug it off and continue with my task of brushing my teeth, but I can't help counting the days, trying to remember my last period. It was three weeks before the Cullen's left, I know this because I had just finished my period when Edward and I… Consummated our relationship.

 _*Flashback*_

 _Charlie is covering the night shift for Officer Reynolds tonight, so I have the house all to myself, and Edward. I have been wanting to trying something tonight that he has made pretty clear is off limits, but I thought that maybe I could try anyways. I have been thinking more and more about taking our physical relationship to the next level, but Edward has always had an excuse… Whether it's because Charlie's home, or his family in in the house, it's a school night, he'll kill me. Well, it's a Saturday, Charlie is working all night, and his family is nowhere in sight. As for the whole "I'll kill you" excuse, I think he has more self control than he gives himself credit for._

 _Besides being a vampire, he is a man… And I intend on relying on the fact that he is a seventeen year old man, who has spent the last hundred years celibate. I know he wants me as much as I want him, I have seen it in his eyes, not to mention the physical reactions. I just have to be thoroughly convincing._

 _Unfortunately, I am not the epitome of seduction and grace, so seducing the world's most beautiful creature should pose more of a challenge than you would think. I have pulled out my most sexy clothes, which is basically tight shorts and a tank top… It's not like I have lingerie, or anything sexy to put on. I will just have to settle for what I have got._

 _I quickly slip into the bathroom before he arrives, wanting to get ready before he sees me. When I walk in I notice a silk garment hanging from the shower rod, with a note hanging on it…_

 _ **Bella,**_

 _ **Put this on. It will be irresistible. Trust me.**_

 _ **You're welcome.**_

 _ **Alice**_

 _I sigh. Great, now Alice know my plans for the evening. Not only do I have to be nervous about seducing my vampire boyfriend, but now my best friend can see all the choices I am going to make._

 _I look at the piece, and notice that it is actually a two piece. There is a midnight blue, silk top with lace that will go down to my nipples. I blush at the thought of him seeing me so exposed, but it is also kind of exhilarating. It has matching shorts that go with it, but are so short they are more like underwear. I don't even want to know how expensive this is, but when has Alice ever bought me anything cheap?_

 _I strip off my clothes from the day and slip on the ensemble; I get goosebumps almost from how soft it feels on my skin. It fits absolutely perfectly, and it wouldn't surprise me if she had it customly made to my sizes. I turn to the mirror, and see the seductress that stands before me._

 _The girl staring back at me has beautiful curves accentuated by the silk that covers only the most sensual parts of her body. Her deep mahogany hair falls in large curls down to her waist, and a light rouge of color on her cheeks. Overall, she is much more beautiful than I could have hoped. This was me, a beautiful seductress._

 _A small smile reaches across me face, and my heart speeds up at the thought of what I am going to do now… I take a deep breath, grab the door knob to turn it gingerly. I know he is already going to be in my room when I walk in because he is very rarely late. As I lightly pad back to my room my heart spikes, and it feels like it is trying to escape my chest. I reach for my door knob and quickly open it, stepping inside before closing it quietly behind me._

 _I hear an audible gasp come from my bed, and I try to hide my smirk. This is going to work._

 _I turn to see Edward laying across my bed, his arms resting behind his head. If it weren't for the strained look on his face he would look very comfortable. He is wearing faded jeans, and a tight black t-shirt that hugs the defined muscles on his chest. My heart stutters at his sheer beauty, I don't know how this man fell in love with me._

 _I decide to play the innocent card. "What?"_

 _He shakes his head as if he isn't seeing me right. He clears his throat, and the look of shock quickly changes to a small smile. "New outfit?"_

 _I smile back. I walk over to my drawers to place my unused shorts and tank top back into the drawers before answering him. "Yes, Alice bought them for me."_

 _He mumbles something that sounds a lot like, "Damnit, Alice…"_

 _I smile, my back turned to his still. I decide to turn around and walk over to the side of the bed where he is laying._

" _Don't you like it?" I say, lifting my arms and slowly turning._

 _I can see the battle he is having with himself in his eyes, but his face remains calm and steady._

" _Yes, it is exquisite, love." He says._

 _I smile bigger at him. "You know it is really soft, so comfortable… Feel the fabric."_

 _I grab his hand and lead it to my hip. He allows his fingertips to graze the material gingerly, before pulling his hand away again. "Yes, quite nice."_

 _I narrow my eyes at him before leaning forward to brush my lips lightly against his, my hand resting on his abdomen. The kiss lingers for moment before I pull away to look in his eyes… I need to get a read on the situation. But the look doesn't last long because he suddenly pulls me forward and crashes his lips against mine, and before I know it I am sitting on top of him, straddling his hips. I run my finger through his hair, grabbing him, pulling him closer to me._

 _He lets out a moan as his hands grasp my hips tightly pulling me tighter against him, creating heavenly friction. I pull away from his lips and drop my mouth to the base of his neck, placing kisses along his neck and collarbone, leading up to his ear. I lightly bite his ear, and he lets out a loud groan._

 _He flips us over quickly so that he is hovering above me, placing kisses on my neck and chest. I sigh, this is working. My plan is working! I reach for his t-shirt, pulling at it, trying to signal I want him to take it off, but his hand grabs mine, stopping me. Our kissing stops abruptly, leaving me breathless, and small pout gracing my face._

" _Bella, we can't." He says sadly, rolling off of me._

 _I moan in frustration. "Why? You want to, I sure as hell want to! Why can't we? You want to, right?"_

" _Of course I want to, but it's not safe." He says, not giving in._

 _I pull myself up onto my knees, annoyance showing clearly on my face. "Edward Anthony Cullen, stop selling yourself short! You are the strongest, bravest, most amazing man I ever met, but you don't seem to see that! I know you, I know you won't hurt me. I want you so badly, I need to feel all of you, to have you inside me. I know you won't hurt me, I trust you."_

 _His eyes widen for a second when I say I want him inside me, but his face becomes pained quickly. "Bella, I can't! I can't risk hurting you. You are the single most important thing in my life, and if I was to hurt you I couldn't live with myself. I'm sorry, I can't."_

 _Embarrassment and disappointment courses through me. The pain of rejection stabs through my stomach, my humiliation clear on my face. A small tear drips down my face, as my hope drops, and quietly whisper in one last attempt, "Please? Try, for me?"_

 _He reaches out to wipe the tear from my face, his face showing worry and pain. He pulls me towards him, and kisses me passionately. "Oh, Bella…"_

 _He continues to kiss me for a minute, his cold hand press up against the small of my back. He pulls away, "Fine… We will try, but if I hurt you the tiniest bit, we will stop. Promise me you'll tell me?"_

 _Excitement fills my blood, "Yes, yes I promise."_

Wince.

Then it hits me... I am three weeks late. I remember about my mother saying when she was pregnant with me morning sickness made her nauseous. No! This is impossible, this cannot be happening! There has to be another explanation, vampires aren't able to have children… Edward couldn't get me pregnant. Could he?

I start hyperventilating thinking this over; suddenly my hands are clammy and I feel nauseous again, but thankfully I got everything out of my stomach last round.

"No, no, no, no…" I murmur as I start pacing in the bathroom, recounting again and again the amount of weeks since my last period. "Oh god, I need to lay down."

I quickly make my way to my bedroom, throwing myself on my bed. My hands are clasped over my eyes as I continue to whisper, "No, no , no, no…"

My throwing up has to be a coincidence, there is no way I am pregnant. There has to be another explanation… I begin thinking over all the possibilities it could be, but my mind keeps jumping to the worst: pregnancy. But, there is no point freaking out just yet, I don't know for sure. I need to take a test before freaking out.

"It's all going to be okay… All okay. No freaking out." I chant to myself, willing the panic to wash away. My mother can't know what I am worried about, and she is going to be back any second. I need to get this sorted out, fast. But how am I supposed to sneak a pregnancy test? Not to mention this is a small town, if I bought a test anywhere here it would spread like wildfire. So, anywhere in Forks is out of the question… I am going to have to figure out a reason to go to Port Angeles alone. Soon. My parents are going to be so mad.

The downstairs door opens and slams shut. "Honey, I'm back! Come get some ginger ale!"

Okay, this problem is going to have to be put on hold temporarily until I can figure out a way to get a test. I need to act as normal as possible… Too bad I suck at acting.

It's been two days since my mom got here, and I still haven't come up with a good reason to go to Port Angeles. If I asked to leave suddenly by myself they certainly would get suspicious, considering I have refused to leave the house in almost three weeks. My worries have become more definite in the last two days, throwing up has become more often. I am worried Charlie and Renee are going to start to notice. So far they have seemed pretty oblivious to my morning throwing up sessions, and for that I am thankful. Although, I am getting more and more anxious in the last couple days and _that,_ my family is noticing. Renee is supposed to leave in two days, and I was going to wait till then, but a part of me thinks the best thing would to find out before and tell both Charlie and Renee together… The thought of telling them something like that makes my stomach churn, knowing how they will react. No parent wants to hear that their teenage daughter is pregnant…

"Honey, you should stop biting your nails." My mother says. I didn't realize that I had been biting my nails, but I quickly remove my hand from my mouth.

"Is there something bothering you? You seem a bit on edge." She asks.

Now is my chance… "Yeah, I think I am just a little anxious to get out of the house. It's been a while." I mumble. "Would you mind if go for a drive for a little bit? I won't be gone long."

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. You need to get out. Do you want me to go with you? I would love to join you…" She says, excited that I will be leaving the house for the first time in the last month.

"Actually, do you mind if I go alone? I think I just need some to think, to process things." I say, hoping that it won't hurt her feelings. "I promise I won't be gone long, and I won't go far. I'll probably just drive around town."

"Of course, sweetie. Anything you need." She says, smiling. "Just text me if you need me. I should call Phil anyways, I think he is starting to worry."

I snort. "Yeah, you wouldn't want him thinking your getting back together with you ex-husband."

She looks at me disapprovingly. "No, Bella… He wouldn't worry about that. He's more worried about you, actually."

I laugh, a painful cynical laugh, but it's laugh. "Alright, Mom. Tell him I say hi."

Before she can continue the conversation I disappear up the stairs to my room to grab my purse and slip on some shoes. I have been wearing baggy clothes even though I am not showing yet, god forbid I am pregnant. I just feel safer in baggy clothes, just in case someone magically knows that I am worried about pregnancy. I slide on a pair of uggs and rush out of my room and down the stairs, anxious to get out of here. I quickly say a goodbye and run out the door before Renee can form a response. I stop briefly, looking at my truck sitting in the driveway, remembering the last time I drove it. It was the day that _he_ left, the day that my whole world came crashing down… The hole in my chest rips painfully, leaving me breathless for a second, and for a brief minute I think about turning around and heading back into the house.

"No." I sigh. I know I need to find out my destiny sooner or later, and sooner would be better.

I push the pain down, and continue to my truck, trying to push all memories of that day away from my mind. As I get in the truck I notice a jacket on the floor, crumpled up; I know automatically that it was his. I had borrowed it the night of my birthday, and forgot to give it back… I grab it and pull it up to my face, and I can still smell the scent of him on it. A dry sob roars out of me as I hold the jacket to my face. I miss him so much, he was everything to me and now I am alone and scared. For a brief moment I am angry at him for leaving me, but the other part of me knows that if he was to show up this second I would run into his arms without hesitation. So much for my feminist side.

I take in one more deep breath of the jacket before laying it carefully on the seat next to me, as if it will turn to ash if I am not careful. I sit for a moment, letting all the feeling inside of me subside, because I have to finish my mission. I turn the key in the ignition and let the truck roar to life, then quickly throw it into reverse, and I am on my way.

I arrive in Port Angeles faster than I had wanted, wanting to prolong this next part of my mission as long as possible. I pull into the Walgreens parking lot, pull into a parking space and turn off the truck. I don't move for a good five minutes, willing myself to get out of the truck…

"You can do this." I whisper before opening the door and jumping out. I don't give myself the chance to chicken out by slamming the door shut and walking quickly to the entrance. I make my way to the aisle that would have pregnancy test, avoiding eye contact with everyone, secretly worried that someone will recognize me.

I find the section with all the pregnancy tests and I quickly grab two of the most expensive types, and make my way to the registers. There is only one checkout counter open with an older lady as the cashier. There isn't any people in line, so I quickly walk up to her and throw the test on the belt, refusing to make eye contact with the woman.

"Hello, dear. Paper or plastic?" She asks, ignoring the fact that a teenager is buying pregnancy test.

"Paper." I mumble, pulling the cash out of my wallet. I practically throw it at her, mumble "Keep the change." and walk out without looking back.

I run to my truck, my bag clutched tightly to my chest, hoping to avoid all notice of the few people out here. I decide that I don't want to take the test at home, worried that my parents will find it before I get a chance to tell them. Or if it's negative, and they find it, having to have the awkward conversation to _why_ I had a pregnancy test. I settle my mind on going to a gas station bathroom, it's as good as any.

I pull into the gas station, turn off the engine and hop out. I notice that the bathroom has a outside entrance, and sigh in relief. Even better. I run into the bathroom, turning and locking the door behind me before pulling the two tests out of the brown paper bag. I quickly scan the directions, pretty basic: pee on stick, wait three minutes… Then find out your destiny. I do what I need to do, not wasting time, and set the two sticks with my pee on them on the sink, beginning the three minute wait. Boy, is this the longest three minutes of my entire existence! I look at my watch thinking it is almost time and it has only been a minute. I start pacing, checking my watch and as the time slowly passes my breathing escalates. I check my watch one last time, take a deep breath before looking down at the two tests.

My breath hitches in my throat, seeing the clear answers on the two small screens. Very visibly, are two small words, _Pregnant._ A tear rushes down my face, but surprisingly not for the reason I thought I would be crying. I thought I would be crying because I would be pregnant, and for a eighteen year old, that is a bad thing. But suddenly, happiness spreads through me and my hands automatically drop to the place where the bump will eventually grow. I may not have Edward here, but I now have a part of him, and I always will. I smile at the thought of having a little baby, a baby that Edward and I created. I couldn't wait to hold my baby in my arms, never having to let go.

I moan as a realization hits me. "I have to tell Charlie and Renee."

Now, _that_ is something I should worry about. My father had made it quite clear that he did not want me having sex, and if I do I should be very careful. Well, in my defense Edward and I thought it impossible for us to conceive a child, him being a vampire and all. But that wasn't something I could I could explain to my parents easily, or at all. As for Renee, she was going to be furious. Throughout my childhood she had branded into my brain that teenage pregnancies are the reason there are so many children in the system. Teenage girls getting pregnant and putting their children up for adoption… And keeping the baby was even worse in my mother's opinion, saying that it ruin girls chances at ever having a future. As much as she ground those beliefs in my brain I couldn't bring myself to regret my child growing within me, I loved it already. If you had asked me two months ago, I would have thought that this is the worst thing that could possibly happen, but now I find that I am overjoyed. How could I not? This baby is the last piece of Edward I have left. Besides the jacket.

I decide that tonight is as good as any for me to break the news, because if my dad kicks me out tonight or my mom disowns me, what does it matter if it's tonight or tomorrow? I have no idea what I will do if Charlie kicks me out… Maybe I can break into the Cullen's old house. I shouldn't think about this now, I'll just psych myself out. I toss one of the pregnancy tests in the trash, and put one back in the paper bag to take with me. I walk out of the bathroom and back to my truck. When I open my truck I grab Edward's jacket, I put it on and rest my hand on my stomach as I begin to leave Port Angeles. I continue like this all the way home.

I finish making dinner, raviolis and garlic bread, and place everything on the table. When Charlie had returned from work, and saw me in the kitchen cooking for the first time in the last month, I saw a small smile crack across his face. He was clearly glad to see me outside the confines of my room. Unfortunately, in a matter of minutes any joy he has for me will blow right out the window.

"Dinner is ready!" I call as Charlie trudges into the kitchen, and I can hear my mom bounding down the stairs.

"This is great, Bells." Charlie muses as he takes a seat.

"Yes, it really is." My mother agrees taking the seat across from Charlie. They always have me sit in the middle when we eat together, because I can tell they are more comfortable not sitting right next to each other. It doesn't bother me, what can you expect from your divorced parents? I am just glad they are civil enough to stay in the same house while Renee visits.

I laugh nervously, my nerves getting to me. "Uh, thanks."

I decide not to tell them till dinner is almost done, because there is no use in ruining a perfectly fine dinner with pregnancy news. We sit and make awkward small talk, Charlie talking about his day, Renee talking about Phil. Most conversations between the three of us are truly awkward, mostly because Charlie isn't fully over my mother, and I think Renee knows that. We be sure to stay on lighter topics, or else I am not sure we could keep up this civil charade. Well, I am about to shoot any peace straight to hell, because our meal is almost over, and it is now or never.

"Hey, Mom, Dad? Before we clean up, there is something that I wanted to talk to you about." I say, trying to keep my tone calm.

"Sure, kid. What is it?" My father says, throwing his crumpled napkin on his plate. Both of them are look at me expectantly, totally unaware that their worlds are about to be turned upside-down.

I take a deep breath, close my eyes for a brief moment before breaking the news.

"I'm uh-" I begin, gulp. "I'm pregnant."

Silence.

I haven't looked up at my parents faces yet, but based off the silence that when I finally do, it's not going to be good.

"I'm sorry, what?!" My mother says, a little louder than normal. I flinch at the sound of her fork clanging to the floor.

I look up and see that my mother is looking at me with wild eyes, her mouth hanging open, clearly outraged. My father on the other hand I just staring at me blankly, like he is not truly understanding what is being said.

"I'm pregnant..?" I say, sounding more like a question.

"Bella, tell me this is a sick joke, because this isn't funny young lady." My mother says through her teeth.

A small tear slips through my eyelashes, "I'm sorry, Mom. I'm so, so sorry.

Her hand lifts to cover her mouth as tears fill her eyes, and she shakes her head slowly. My father's face has slowly turned from blank to a expression of pure anger. "Bella, whose baby is it?"

"Edwards…" I whisper, knowing that he isn't going to like this answer.

His face turns a strange color of purple, then to red before he throws his fork onto the table and quickly pushes away from the table. He turns around and marches out of the room, and soon enough I hear him making his way up the stairs.

 _Slam!_

His bedroom door slams shut, and I jolt with the noise.

"Bella, how did this happen?" She asks. I can't tell if it is disappointment or sadness framing her voice.

Another tear escapes my eyes. "Sex?"

She rolls her eyes, but then sighs, probably deciding that is as good answer as any. How else do unplanned babies get made?

I suppose I should explain myself a little. "We didn't think it was possible for Edward to get me pregnant… He was sick as a child, one of the side effects were that he was _supposed_ to be sterile. We didn't know… I am so sorry, Mom."

"And you didn't think to use condoms anyways? That was very foolish Bella." She chides.

"I know, Mom. It was stupid, and irresponsible. I don't know what to do." I say, a small sob escaping my mouth.

"Oh, Bella!" She cries, getting up and throwing her arms around my shoulders, we are both crying now. We hold each other for a good couple minutes before she pulls away to say something.

"Bella, I am very disappointed." She begins. Another sob rips out of me. "But, you are my daughter, and I love you. So, we are going to figure this out, because that is my grandbaby in there and I want to be a part of yours and my grandchilds life."

I sniffle, grossly wiping my nose with my sleeve. "Really?"

She smiles sadly. "'Of course, darling. I love you."

She kisses my forehead, and I pull her into another hug, nuzzling my face into her neck. "Thank you, Mama."

I haven't called her Mama since I was probably nine years old, but now it just seemed to slip out of my mouth. The name seemed to hit her heart because she held me closer to her when I said the word.

"What about Dad?" I asked, not lifting my head from her neck.

She sighed and pulled away, went to sit in the chair next to me. We sat silently for a minute while she processed the question.

"You just need to give your Dad time, sweetie. I'm sure he will come around." She says, although I can tell that she isn't sure of her answer. "I can't imagine that he wouldn't want to be part of his grandchild's life."

I nodded, knowing that that was the best answer I was going to get… I was hoping she was right, but I wasn't setting my heart on it. I won't blame him if he doesn't want me to stay here any longer, but I am not sure I want to move to Florida. As much as this town bring many unwanted memories, it has become my true home. Although, I know that being the only pregnant eighteen-year-old in Forks won't be easy. I knew that for the time being, I would spend the next years in Forks.


	2. Chapter 2

I am now four months pregnant, and so far I have managed to hide my growing baby bump with strategic sweaters and sweat pants. Fortunately, I have always had a lack of style, and all of Forks is well aware of my depression over the Cullen's leaving. I have used those facts to my benefit when going to school and to work, but I am not going to be able to hide it much longer. A part of me wants to see how long I can hide this, but the other part of me wants to throw caution to the wind and just walk proudly into the school with my stomach front and center. What is the worst that could happen? People gossip? They are already gossiping to why Edward would leave me behind, why not add pregnant to the list?

Renee was right, it only took time for Charlie to come around. After two days of not talking to me, he sat me down and discussed my options. He wanted to know if I was willing to put the baby up for adoption, but when I quickly shot that idea down he accepted it. He was definitely disappointed in me, but he wasn't willing to throw away our relationship over this pregnancy. Anyways, in the last month I think that he has warmed up to the idea of being a grandfather. He has come home a couple times from trips to the city with an assortment of baby clothes and baby toys. He wants me to continue to live with him after the baby is born, but I am worried about space, and the fact that I am going to have a crying baby keeping me up at night. I don't want to burden my father with sleepless nights as well. I haven't told him that I have been looking for apartments in the area, but unfortunately this is a small town and there isn't a plethora of open houses. I have expanded my search to Port Angeles, but I really don't want to move there.

Renee has been emailing me online parenting articles, and has mailed me several books like _What to Expect When You're Expecting,_ and _What to Expect the First Year._ I have spent most of my recreational time reading these books, and articles, because the truth is I don't know the first thing about parenting. Renee is going to be a great grandmother, I am so blessed to have both my parents on my side. It would have been so easy for them to disown me, and have no part in my life. I wouldn't have blamed them. No one wants to have their daughter pregnant while still in high school.

I pull on the new pair of maternity pants I ordered online; my old jeans won't fit over my growing belly. I rub my hands over my bump, love coursing through my veins. Suddenly I feel a light shift in my stomach, which caused me to gasp. He kicked! I couldn't believe it, I felt him kick for the first time. Tears started to run down my face, happy to feel the life growing inside me finally coming into a life of his own. I don't know for sure that my baby is a boy, but it's what I imagine when I picture my little baby. I smile and continue to get ready for my day, pulling a large baggy sweater over my head, and pulling Edward's jacket around me. I have worn his jacket almost everyday, not willing to let it go.

As I make my way to school I continue my inner debate whether or not I am going to show my baby bump at school. I really think I should just get it over with, but everytime I think about taking the step I chicken out. The only people who continue to have any communication with me is Angela, her boyfriend Ben and Mike. Angela because she is a genuinely good person, and Mike because I think he still has a hope that I will be with him. I knew that as soon as he realized I was carrying Edward's baby that that hope will quickly fade.

"Hey, Bella!" I hear Angela call from behind me as I jump out of my truck. I turn around, holding my bookbag in front of my stomach.

"Hi, Angela." I smile. "How are you?"

"I'm good. How about you?" She asks back.

"As good as I can be." I answer truthfully, a small laugh escaping my lips.

She shifts nervously, like she want to ask me something but isn't sure how I will answer. Oh no, does she know?

"I was wondering if you wanted to come over tonight? Like for a girls night?"

I sigh. "I don't know, Angela… Can I give you an answer in a little bit?"

The answer truthfully depends on whether or not I decide to out myself today or not. If I do, and she is still willing to be friends with me I would be willing to go over to her house. Assuming that her parents don't mind a teenage pregnant girl in their home.

"Yeah, sure." She smiles, kindly. "See you at lunch?"

I nod, returning the smile. "Yeah, see you then."

The first half of school blurs by uneventfully as I continue to cogitate my options. The idea of just coming out as pregnant is becoming more and more appealing, because I have always been the kind of person who like to get things over with. I know that things will be bad for a while, but after a while it will blow over and all will go back to normal… Well, somewhat. By the time the lunch bell rings I have just about made up my mind to go for it; it's just the process of _actually_ doing it that will take some work.

As I enter the cafeteria I pull off my jacket, just leaving my baggy sweater. I know I am going to have to take off the sweater if I really want to make it known, but I am pretty proud of myself for taking off the jacket. It is the first step, and I succeeded. I walk over to the food line, grab a piece of pizza, an apple and an apple juice before heading over to the empty table that used to be the table the Cullen's would sit at. Now, it is usually just me who sits here, but every now and then Angela will come sit with me. I set my tray down, and with a large breath I slide my sweater over my head leaving me in just my pants and form fitting t-shirt. It shows off my growing belly very well.

As soon as I take my sweater off I begin to hear gasps and whispers, and I know they are looking right at my stomach. A deep blush spreads up to my face as I take my seat, my nerves causing me to feel a bit nauseous.

"What the hell, Bella?" I hear a voice ring out. I look over to see Jessica standing ten feet away, her mouth agape. Lauren comes up behind her, her face showing just as much shock as Jessica's for a brief moment before becoming an annoying smirk.

Jessica comes closer, her face still shocked. "Bella, you're not… Are you?"

"Yes, Jess. I am." I say more calmly than I would have expected.

I think she is going to say something, but then she quickly turns her back to me and walks quickly to her table across the cafeteria.

"See you later, preggers." Lauren says in her nasal voice before turning and following Jessica. I just roll my eyes and turn my attention to my pizza, ignoring all the stage whispers and questions swirling around me.

Soon enough I hear someone approach, but to my surprise, they pull a chair out and seat themselves next to me. When I look up I see Angela sitting, staring at me, one eyebrow raised quizzically.

"Anything new with you, Bella?" She ask.

I laugh nervously. "Yeah, a couple things."

"I can see that…" She muses. "Were you planning on telling me… Or what?"

"Well, this was kind of my way of telling you. I'm sorry." I say looking at her apologetically. I know she deserved a better explanation than this, but I wasn't sure how to do it.

She just shrugs. "Oh, well. So are you coming over tonight?"

I raise my eyebrows at her. "Are you sure you still want me to come over? I am clearly not the best influence."

She smiles. "Of course I still want you to come over. Sure, this is some big news, but you are still my friend."

"Are you sure your parents want you hanging out with a pregnant teenager?"

"Oh, don't worry about that. My mom got pregnant with me when she was seventeen, it shouldn't be a problem." She says as if this was common knowledge. I had no idea that her mom had her so young.

"Well, if I am still welcome, I would love to." I say, relief filling me. Just knowing that at least one person here wasn't going to look at me like I was some whore was such a reprieve.

A small smile reaches across her face, the happiness truly filling her eyes. I smile back at her, glad to have her loyal friendship.

"So, are you going to live with your dad after the baby is born?" She asks, picking up her drink to take a sip. "Assuming you're keeping the baby…"

Her sentence trails off, her eyes flicker up to me, hoping I wouldn't be offended by her assumption.

I smile at her. "Yes, I am keeping him."

"It's a boy?"

I blush, suddenly bashful. "Well, actually I don't know… But that's what I imagine the baby being."

She just nods, not prying further. I always appreciated that about Angela, she is kind but never wants to pry too much. Never forces you to talk about things that you don't want to talk about. With me, there are several subjects that I never talk about, but she never pushes me to talk or discuss the things that make the hole in my chest to flare.

"And, I don't know… " I say, answering her question from before. "Charlie wants me to stay, but there is only two rooms, and babies are quite disruptive. It's hard enough having a knocked up teenage daughter. I don't want to be more of a burden than I need to be."

"I'm sure he wouldn't see you or the baby as a burden, Bella" She says, reassurance coating her voice.

I shrug. "Babies cry a lot. He'll be keeping me up at night, no use keeping Charlie up too."

"True, I guess."

We sit in silence for a while, both of us comfortable not talking.

"Hey, Bella!" I hear Mike call from behind me. He walks around the table, and pulls out a chair opposite from me. "You'll never guess the rumor that I heard just now. But don't worry, I got your back… I told them to shut it."

I raise my eyebrow at Mike, the news of my pregnancy must have not hit home with him yet.

"There were a bunch of kids saying you were pregnant, but you think we would have noticed that, right?" He laughs as he picks up a fry off his plate to stuff into his mouth.

"Um, Mike?" Angela says, a entertained look in her eyes.

"What?" He asks incredulously, his eyes flickering from me to Angela, and back to me. His gaze finally make its way down to my bulging stomach, his eyes widen, his jaw drops open.

"Suprise?" I say, my voice cracking a little.

He continues to stare at my stomach, his mouth still hanging slack. "Wait- You're really knocked up?"

I nod, careful not to smile at the dumbfounded look on his face.

"Like with a _real_ baby?" He asks.

I bite my tongue, wanting the sarcasm to to flow freely. But rude sarcastic comments is probably not the best approach. I just need to be straight-forward; truthful.

I nod. "Yes, Mike."

He stares at me, his mind still reeling. "Like, you're going to have a baby? Like, a _real_ baby?"

"Yes."

His eyebrows pull down into a line across his forehead. His head shakes lightly, as if trying to shake an unwanted thought from his head.

"Does Edward know?" he asks.

Wince. "No."

"So, you're just going to have a baby, on your own?"

"Yes."

His face softens, his shock seeming to fade away. "Damn."

I giggle. "Yeah. Damn."

Both Angela and Mike let out nervous laughter, taken aback by my nonchalance.

Mike takes a deep breath, picks up another fry, and says simply. "Well, congrats, _Mom."_

I laugh. "Um, thanks."

And I really was grateful. The only two people who bothered to talk to me anymore didn't run out screaming, scared to be associated with the pregnant, depressed, abandoned girl. I will be eternally grateful to Mike and Angela, for being my friends, even when I wasn't much of one in return. I am determined to be a better friend, not allowing the people that left me to ruin my life, my friendships, or the life of my child that I am going to raise. I want a good life for my child, and I will do whatever possible for him to live a full and happy life; just him and me.

My time at Angela's was more enjoyable than I could have hoped. It was the first time that I felt welcomed and even encouraged to talk about my excitement about my impending motherhood. Mrs. Weber was so kind about my situation, and even offered for me to come live with them after the baby was born. She said she understood the pressure of being a young mother can be intense, that having a loving home was something that she wished she had had when she was in my situation. As much as I am grateful for the offer, I am determined not to burden anymore people with the weight of a teenage pregnancy. Both of her parents were happy to hear that both my parents had accepted the situation, and were truly becoming excited about being grandparents. Mrs. Weber didn't go into too much detail about her experience, but from what I gathered, her parents weren't quite as understanding.

Angela and I had a good time, playing with her young twin brothers, talking about our plan for the future, and just enjoying each other's company. There were times when tears would come to my eyes, as I would remember the last time I got any relief or sense of joy from association… Angela would notice my emotional moments, but didn't push it. When I left, her family reassured me that I was welcome to come over any time, that their door was always open.

As I pulled up to my house I saw a dull red car pulled into the spot that my car usually parks. Charlie must have company over for the game he had mentioned this morning. I pull up to the curb, shut off the engine, and hop out slamming the door behind me. When I walk into the house, I hear the cheers of several men coming from the living room. Maybe if I am quiet enough I can slip upstairs without notice.

"Bells? Is that you?" Charlie calls out. Apparently I am not as quiet as I hoped.

"Yeah, Dad." I call back.

"Come in here, there are some people who want to say hi." He says.

I sigh, a little tired from my already social evening, but I hang my purse up and make my way to the living room. When I walk in I immediately spot a very large boy lounging on the couch, almost taking up the entirety of the couch with his massive size. Sitting next to him in a wheelchair is a man with long grey hair pulled back into a ponytail tied loosely at the nape of his neck. I automatically recognized the older man as Billy Black, the previous owner of my ancient truck. But my eyes strayed back to the large boy next to him. The boy had short cropped, ink black hair, dark russet skin that pulled tight over the large muscles that cover him head to toe. When I look at his face I recognize the eyes that stare back at me, but they are placed on the wrong body. The boy who owned these eyes was much smaller, younger, and had long silky black hair.

"Bella, Billy and Jacob came over to watch the game."

I nod, continuing to stare at Jacob, the very large boy. The picture is wrong… The Jacob I once knew was like a personal ray of sunshine. His smile could light up a whole room; his joy for life was unbeatable. But this boy, who is closer to a man, looks back at me with ancient eyes. Like he has lived through pain, loss, and suffering despite his young age. Although he doesn't particularly look sad at the moment, I can see the sadness behind the mask.

"Jake?" I finally say, my voice incredulous. "Is that really you?"

He smiles, and for a second I can see the boy I once knew. He stands up, strangely gracefully, and takes two strides towards me. He laughs lightly, and pulls me into a tight hug. It's strange because when you hug someone you don't expect their skin to be like a furnace, but every part of him that touches my skin is hot, almost like he has a high fever.

"Yeah, it's me. I've grown a couple inches."

I pull back to get a full look at him, but his head is a lot higher than I expected it to be, closer to seven feet than six.

I snort. "Yeah, try two feet. And you cut your hair!"

He shrugs, a comfortable smile on his face. "It's easier to manage."

I nod. "I can imagine."

His eyes trail down to my stomach, linger there for a second, before looking back up at me with a raised eyebrow.

I laugh nervously. "Yeah, a couple things have changed with me too."

I subconsciously run my hand over my protruding belly, and I look up at Jake through my eyelashes.

"I see that." He smiles. We look at each other for several minutes, quiet, giving each other time to process all the changes in each of us. Apparently, we have been quiet for too long, and I hear a voice clear across the room, pulling us from our revery.

We turn to look at Charlie and Billie. Billie is sitting back, relaxed in his wheelchair, with a hint of mischief in his dark, wise eyes. Charlie is still on the couch but looks slightly perturbed at the elongated greeting between Jacob and I. I can't tell if it is because we were continuing to interrupt his game, or because Jake and I's interactions were making him uncomfortable, but he was narrowing his eyes at us.

"Um, Bells, we have a game to watch. You are welcome to join us if you would like…" Charlie says.

The idea of sitting watching some game I have no interest in sound utterly boring. Anyways, I wouldn't know what was happening the entire game. Sports have never been particularly enjoyable for me to watch, or even to play.

"No, I'll leave you boys to it. Do you need me to make something for dinner?"

"That's alright, we have a pizza on the way." Billie cuts in.

I smile at him. "Alright."

I see Jake shift slightly out of the corner of my eye, "Uh, I would really love to catch up with Bella if that is alright?"

Charlie's eyes look at me, asking if I'm okay with the change of plans, and I nod very small in ascent.

"You sure you want to miss the game, kid? It's a good one." Charlie says.

Jake shrugs, "I could play better than any of these goons anyways. I don't think I'll miss much."

Both Charlie and Billie laugh, and Billie says, "You're probably right, son."

We linger for another second, awkward silence filling the small room.

I decide to break the silence. "Okay, Jake and I will be up in my room."

We only take a step towards the door before Charlie blurts out, "No boys in your room, Bella. Can't you guys go in the kitchen or something?"

I turn around, rolling my eyes. "What? Afraid we will have sex, and I'll get pregnant? A little late on that train, Dad." I wink at Jake, and he laughs. "Anyways my back is killing me, and I don't think kitchen chairs will be comfortable."

Charlie narrows his eyes at me, but then shrugs and sits back on the couch. "Just keep the door open."

I roll my eyes again, but agree quickly.

Before there can be any more interjections, we make our way up the stairs. We ramble into my room and I go to sit in the rocking chair across the room, while Jake sprawls out across my bed. He is so large, his feet hang a foot off the end of the bed.

"Jacob you really are huge… You've grown at least a foot and a half since I last saw you. How does that even happen?" I laugh.

He smiles, and nods at me. "Well, I can say the same about you, except al least I've grown in height, not width."

I stick my tongue out at him, but laugh.

"And you cut your hair!" I say, finally fixating on his head. My heart sinks when I think of that long ebony hair, completely gone.

He shrugs, "It become to difficult to manage. Anyways, you don't like the new look?"

I blush, and let out an embarrassed laugh. "It's not that I don't like it… It's just a big change, I guess."

He nods. Then he gets a thoughtful look in his eyes. "So, you're going to be a mom, huh?"

I smile, and my hand automatically shifts to rub over the swell of my baby bump. "Yeah, I suppose so. It was never on my list to do, you know, being a teenage mother… But I can't say it's a bad thing."

"I get that. You've already have the mother's love."

"I've had it from the moment I knew that I was pregnant. It's funny how it just kicks in like that. I never saw myself as the maternal type. But now, there is nothing in the world I wouldn't do for this little worm." I sigh.

He snorts. "Worm." He chortles once, then smiles.

"I have no idea how to be a mom, especially a single mom, but I guess I'll figure it out along the way. My mom did it, lots of people do, I guess. I just always wanted to raise my kids with the person that I was going to spend my life with. But that's not how life goes, I suppose."

His eyes narrows, puzzled. "Speaking of that… Is the father going to be involved at all?"

The hole in my chest rips painfully, and it is all I can to maintain a serene look. "No, he doesn't even know I am pregnant."

He nods. "So, who is the lucky guy anyway? Just some one night stand after your break-up or something?"

Jacob was no longer looking at me, but staring stoically out the window. His questions stops me short, and I inhale a sharp breath. My inhale catches his attention, and suddenly he is looking intensely into my eyes. I look down, almost embarrassed to answer his question, and I guess I don't even have to answer it, but there is something inside me begging to confide in him.

"No. Not a one night stand." I breath. "It was Edward Cullen, my ex-boyfriend."

Faster than I think possible for someone his size he is suddenly on his feet. He is looking down at me, a intense look in his eye, almost like anger… Or hate?

"Bella, who did you say was the father?" His voice now cold and angry. I just stare up at him in utter surprise in his sudden mood change.

"Bella…" He says again, his voice stern. "Answer me."

I pull myself up out of the rocking chair with a little effort to relieve _some_ of the height difference. And frankly he is scaring me.

"Edward Cullen."

He closes his eyes, and breathes in deeply, his breath shaking slightly. Then I notice that his hands are almost vibrating, sending shivers up his brawny arms.

"Jake, are you okay?" I ask. I have the urge to reach out and touch him, but a stronger part of me is pulling me a couple steps back.

"That's impossible." He almost yells. "There is no way that that blood- I have to go."

He turns and practically sprints out of my room. A second too late, his sentence clicks in my mind. Although, it makes absolutely no sense in this context.

"That what?!" I yell after him. He said, _There is no way that that blood…_

That blood what? How would he even know? Impossible.

"Jake!" I yell, and I start after him. He is much faster than I am, so he is out of sight in seconds. I can't seem to make it down the stairs fast enough. Before I reach the bottom I hear the open and slamming of our front door, and I know that there is no way I will catch him now. But I need to know what he was going to say. And why he reacted so strongly to Edward's name.

"Bells? Is everything okay?" I hear Charlie call from the living room. I hear him hoist himself off the couch and walk quickly into the entrance-way. I am just standing there, my mouth agape, and my hands resting on my stomach.

I hear the familiar sound of wheels against linoleum and Billy rolls his way into the area as well. His face suspiciously less surprised than I would have imagined. His son just bolted out of our house in a random fit of anger, taking off into the darkness.

I shake my head, trying to put my brain back together. "Yeah, fine. Well, I don't know actually. He just got mad and left. I don't know why."

"Mad?" Charlie asks.

I shake my head. "Yeah, I don't know. One second we were having a nice conversation, the next he asks me about the father of the baby, and when I told him he got all angry and took off."

Charlie raises his eyebrow and looks down at Billy questioningly, but gets no reaction from him. Billy just shrugs and says quietly, "Yeah, the kids got a temper."

I look at him, and I notice behind the serene ancient look in his eyes, I see something else. Almost like a divine knowing, or understanding. One way or another, he is set on playing dumb, but I don't buy it.

"Well, maybe he's mad that the father took off or something." Charlie says.

I flinch, but shrug, feigning disinterest. On the contrary, I am more determined than ever to find out what the Black family knows about my long gone vampire family.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi guys! Sorry it has been so long since I posted last... My computer broke and didn't really have access to write my chapters. Hopefully things will be a bit more regular, and my computer won't crap out on me. Thanks for all your support for my story. I hope you enjoy!**

 _ ***Disclaimer: All characters belong to Stephanie Meyers.***_

The roar of my truck comes to a stop as I turn the ignition off, and suddenly it seems so quiet. A small house stands ahead of me. It has chipped red paint and a make-shift garage off the side of the house. It seems like such a small place for such a large boy to live.

Before I have a chance to pull myself out of my car Billy rolls out of the house in his wheelchair- a smooth mask of indifference plastered to his face. We just stare at each other for a moment before he raises his hand to wave me in. I unbuckle and drag myself out of my truck, careful not to slip. Having a protruding stomach has not helped my balance in the slightest, but I have to be more careful not to fall than I used to have to. I'm no longer the only person dependant on this clumsy body of mine.

I slam the truck door shut and start making my way to the little house. Billy had already rolled back inside by the time that I had even opened my truck door. As I step up to the open front door I notice the decorations, or lack of, in the small front room. Just a bland brown leather couch facing a TV and a coffee table a couple feet away. The only sort of decorative touch is a painting on the far wall next to the kitchen of a wolf howling on a lonesome rock. Overall, the room is very utilitarian. The only things in the room are what is necessary.

"Have a seat, Bella." Billy says from across the room.

I shift in my place for a second. "Is Jake around?"

"He should be back any minute now." Billy says gesturing to the couch.

I sigh, and trudge across the room to the ancient leather couch. I try to sit down gracefully, but my pregnancy belly makes me wobble a little as I plop down.

"Would you like any coffee?" Billy asks.

My hand cradles my swollen baby bump, "Can't. Caffeine is bad for the baby."

He nods. "Ahh, yes. I forgot all the dietary restrictions that come with pregnancy."

"Yes, it's a lot of fun. Coffee has been greatly missed." I mumble. "So, Jake is coming home soon."

"Yes." He says simply.

The silence drags on, and I get a feeling that there is something that Billy wants to say, but he is holding back. The more suspicious side of me wonders if it has to do with the father of my child, but I could be wrong. I probably am. We continue to sit, waiting.

"Bella?"

I jump from the familiar voice coming from behind me. For one, I was expecting for Jake to come through the front door versus the back hallway. Two, I thought that I would have heard him approaching.

"I thought you were out?" I say, looking at Billy.

Jake narrows his eyes at me before answering. "I was. I came through my bedroom window."

I raise my eyebrows. "Must be a big window."

He smiles and walks over to plop himself down on the couch with me.

"What's with the visit , Swan?" He says.

"What? I can't just stop over and see a friend?" I ask, overly innocently.

He laughs. "Sure. But you never have before. Just was wondering what prompted the sudden drop by."

"Well, you left so suddenly the other night, and I didn't really get a chance to say goodbye, so I thought I'd stop by and see if you wanted to hang out for a bit." _And if you want to spill any information you have about the Cullen's, that would be much appreciated_ , I think sarcastically.

His eyebrows pull together for a second, but then he smooths out his expression, and a bashful smile creeps across his face.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I wasn't feeling well that night."

I raise my eyebrow at him. He seemed just fine until I brought up Edward. But I decide to play along. "Oh, I'm sorry. You're feeling better, right? If not, I can go-".

"No!" He cuts me off. "Please stay. It's nice to see you."

I smile. "It's nice to see you too."

"So, what do you wanna do?" He asks.

"I don't know… What do you La Push kids do for fun around here?" I ask.

He shrugs. "Hang out at the beach mostly."

I smile. "That sounds like fun, let's do that."

He glances down at my stomach. "Are you sure you're in the condition to go to the beach."

"Oh, yeah maybe you're right. If I walk too much this baby might just _fall_ out." I say, rolling my eyes.

He laughs. "Okay, okay. Got it, pregnant, not disabled."

I pat him on the shoulder. "Hey! Now you're getting the idea."

* * *

Jake and I walk down the beach for a while before we find a large log to sit on. Conversation has been light-hearted- How have you been? How is school? Jake talks about the car that he fixed up from scrap metal. I forgot how easily conversation has always flowed between us. It's nice to have a somewhat normal conversation with someone. He doesn't treat me like I'm fragile, like I'm about to break down into hysterics at any minute. Ever since the Cullen's left, even Charlie has treated me different. It's nice to have someone just treat me like nothing ever happened.

The conversation lulls for a moment between topics, but something about his posture has be wondering if he has something specific he wants to talk about. It doesn't take long before my suspicions become correct and he clears his throat.

"So, you don't have to answer this" Jacob says, the conversation taking a serious turn. "but does _he_ know that you're pregnant?"

I wince at the thought of him, and I sigh through the pain. "No."

He nods, his face sullen. He has changed so much in the last few months. He is no longer the ray of sunshine, who warms up the whole room with just his smile- there is sadness behind his eyes now. When I look in his eyes now, I see the same sort of aged wisdom that I see in Billy's eyes. But every now and then, the sunshine cracks through the tough exterior and I see that by that used to be there. I wonder what changed.

He clears his throat. "One more question… Are they coming back?"

Wince. "No."

He nods again. He looks out at the ocean, and I can't seem to read the emotions that are playing on his face. Anger? Sadness? Worry? Maybe all of it.

"What happened to you, Jake?" I ask before I can stop myself.

He turns his head to look at me, his black eyes emotionless. "What do you mean?"

I shrug. "I don't know. You seem different. You cut your hair, you suddenly grew two feet, and you seem… sad."

He looks down at his feet, and takes a couple deep breaths before answering.

"I can't tell you. But you're right, things have changed." He says, his voice angry. When I look at his hands there are shaking again like they were in my bedroom.

"Why?" I ask.

He turn to look at me, his eyes daggers. "Because you can't."

His tone was cruel, almost vicious. As I look into his eyes, I suddenly see that Jacob Black can be dangerous. My arms wrap around my stomach instinctively, protective of my child. Tears spring to my eyes, and I stand up to walk away, but warm hands wrap around my arm.

"Wait- Bella." He says, his voice apologetic. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

His hands are still wrapped around my arm, cutting off the circulation. "Jake, please let go. You're hurting my arm."

He jumps back. "Oh, sorry."

I smile at him. "It's okay. I shouldn't have stuck my nose in your business."

His face falls. "I want to tell you, I really do. I just… Can't."

I stare at him for a long moment, taking in what he is saying. When he looks me in the eyes, I seen pain and more sadness than I have ever seen before. Well, besides Edward. I can't understand it, because Jake and I really haven't spent much time together, but I am suddenly very protective over him.

"Is somebody hurting you, Jake?" I ask.

He laughs flatly, not reaching his eyes. "You really think that someone could hurt me?"

He gestures to his massive form, and suddenly that does seem like a silly thought. "Well, I guess not."

"You already know, Bella. You just have to remember." He says, his expression suddenly becoming hopeful. "Remember that story I told you a while ago? When you came here with some of your high school friends?"

I think back to when I was trying to figure out what Edward was, and how I had _flirted_ with Jake to get information out of him. He told me a story about the ancestors of the Quileute tribe and the _cold ones._

"Yes, about the cold ones?" I ask.

He sighs. "Of course that's all you remember."

Well, that is the only part of the story that mattered at the time. Of course, I don't say that out loud.

I think back to the story, but I only remember bits and pieces, besides that part about the Cullens. I remember something about wolves, or some kind of treaty. It could be the pregnancy brain, but the story is all muddled in my brain, and I don't understand what the story has to do with Jacob.

I shake my head. "What else was there to the story?"

He grabs my face, each of his palms on my cheeks. I jump at the contact, not only because I am not used to men other than Edward being this close to me, but because his skin is absurdly warm.

"Jake! You're burning up!" I say, worry laced into my voice.

He automatically pulls his hands away. "Yeah, I run a little warm."

I raise my eyebrows at him. "A little warm? You're hands could fry an egg."

He laughs. "We should try that."

"I'm serious, Jake! You should go see a doctor."

He just shrugs it off and sits back down on the log. "It's fine. Don't worry about it, Bella."

I roll my eyes and plop myself back down on the log next to him.

He turns to look me in the eyes, and reaches out to grab my hand. "Just try to remember, okay? For me."

I'm about to reply when a ear-splitting howl comes from the wooded hill behind the beach. It sounded like a wolf- a really close by wolf. But that is not the weird part, as soon as the howl rang off Jake shot up like a bullet and stares in the direction of the woods, his eyes narrowing.

"We have to go." He says, and starts pulling me back down the beach in the direction of his house.

* * *

Jacob had practically dragged me back to his house as fast as he could without harming me. I could see the slight annoyance at my clumsiness every time I tripped over an invisible object. As soon as we got back to his house he pulled me into his house, threw the TV remote at me and told me not to leave until he gets back. As I looked in his dark, worried eyes I knew there was a reason he did not want me to leave the reservation, and I was not about to challenge him.

After an hour of sitting on the couch I get a little ancy, feeling the need to do _something._ I get up and start pacing around the small living room, wishing they had more to look at. I am not in the mood to sit and watch mindless TV. I don't know why, but I feel as if there is something wrong. Maybe after learning about the world of the supernatural, I am a little superstitious- but there is something inside me that senses that something is not right.

Right as I was about to pick up the phone to call Jacob, he comes strolling through the front door. He still looks worried, but he seem much more tired than he was when he left. I look closer and I seem the defined dark circles around his eyes. It looks like he hasn't slept in days.

"Everything okay?" I ask.

He walks past me and plops on the couch, his head lulling back. "Yeah, for now."

"Was there a reason that I had to stay here?" I ask, pushing for more information.

He lifts his head to look at me, and he forces a smile onto his face. "No reason, just wanted to give you a proper goodbye."

I raise my eyebrows. He forced me to stay back at his house by myself for over an hour to say _goodbye?_ Something isn't adding up. "Well, I am getting tired and it looks like you could use a couple days sleep yourself. Are you sure everything is okay?"

He frowns, and a look crosses his face that says he wants to tell me something but there is something stopping him. For a second my heart hurts to see such a grown-up, sad look on this boy. The look he has in his eyes reminds me of Edward- before I knew his family's secret. A look of frustration, anger, and ancient grief. There is something more going on in the Black family than they want me to believe.

I walk over to where he sits, and put my hand under his chin so that he looks up at me. "Jake, you know you can tell me anything, right?"

He stares at me for a long minute, his mouth open as if to say something, but then snaps it shut. He closes his eyes leans back. "It's getting late, Bella. You should head home."

A sharp pain runs through my chest, a pain I can't explain. I haven't been around him much lately, but since I saw him the other night, it is like there is a magnet pulling me towards him. I want him to be happy, and I when I look in his eyes I know that there is something wrong and a part of me want to make it better.

I sigh, knowing that I am not going to get anything out of him tonight. "Okay, Jake. I'll see you around."

As I turn to walk toward the front door he grabs my hand, and I turn to look at him again.

"Bella, please just to try to remember the story. I can't tell you, but you already know. Just- try, okay?" He practically begs.

I nod, and walk out the front door, a feeling of loss as walk further away from Jake. I have a new determination to remember what he needs me to, but as I think back about the story of the Quileutes all I can remember is the _cold ones._

 **Sorry this chapter is a little short, but the next one will be longer. I promise!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey, peoples! I am sorry it's been so long since my last update.. I would love to say that things will be regular from now on, but I am pretty tied up with college at the moment. I will try my best to continue my story.. But have patience, my dears. Hope you enjoy!**

 ** _*Disclaimer: All rights to this story belong to the legendary Stephanie Meyers.. All praise belongs to her.*_**

It's cold… I can hear the crashing of the ocean waves not far off. I look around at the unfamiliar surroundings and realize I am laying on the ground looking up through a web of trees. A shiver runs through my body, the cold penetrating every inch of my skin. I reach down to caress my swollen stomach where my child lies, but find nothing. My stomach is flat, and a sharp pang of anxiety runs through me as I wonder where my child went. I hear a fierce growl come from my left, and my head whips toward the sound. At first I see nothing, but then a large form emerges from the darkness of the surrounding trees- a russet brown wolf steps toward me.

There is something familiar of this creature, but I can't put my finger on it. I look into its large dark eyes and see my reflection staring back at me. But beneath my reflection, the gaze of the wolf is familiar, like I have stared into those eyes before. It stares down at me, and I should be scared but I have a sense of safety that my body should not warrant.

One second I am looking into its large peaceful eyes, and the next the wolf is crouched down in a defensive position and his large teeth are barred- ready to rip and tear. But I realize that the wolf is not baring its teeth at _me_ but at something on the other side of me. I turn my head in the direction of the threat and see a familiar figure, who sends blades of ice through my bloodstream. Before me stands a woman with fiery red hair whipping in the wind that doesn't seem to be here. She is poised gracefully over what looks like white rocks: but as I look closer I see that the rocks are not rocks at all. They are pieces of a person, ripped and shattered into unrecognizable sections- except one piece that comes rolling towards me. The piece comes to a stop just a foot from me, and when I realize what it is I let out a loud scream of agony. Sitting in front of me, eyes open, empty of life is Edwards head. Tears start streaming down my face and I attempt to reach out to my love, but soon come to the realization that I no longer can move my limbs.

Sobs wrack through my body for a long moment, but then my grief is interrupted by a high pitched laugh. I look towards the fiery woman poised to strike, her face glowing with a ear-to-ear grin of success. I want to scream and curse her for what she has done, but I no longer can find my voice; my screams get lost with the crash of the waves. I look at her for a long moment before she lunges, and I know that my life will come to an end soon. A part of me hopes my death comes fast instead of the drawn-out torturous death that I know awaits me. She leaps for my throat, teeth bared, and I jolt awake with a scream.

I wake up, my heart racing, and sweat dripping down every inch of my body. My hand instinctively flies to my stomach, and I sigh feeling my baby there again. As if acknowledging that I am awake, the baby kicks me lightly.

I kick off all my blankets, needing to free myself from the heat. Once all of the offending blankets are on the floor I begin to rub slow circles on my belly, and begin murmuring, "Just a dream… Just a dream, baby…"

Before I know it I am opening my eyes up to a bright sunny morning, a rarity here in the rainiest place in the continental U.S. Apparently I fell asleep again, fortunately with no nightmares this time. Sunny days bring happiness, but it also brings on a flare of pain in the hole in my chest. Everytime the sun pops through these heavy clouds I am reminded of my vampire family, and how they would have to stay in on days like today. A part of me wonders if my child will have to worry about going out in the sun like her father does, but I guess we will worry about that when it comes to it. There are a lot of things that are a mystery about my pregnancy, and it often brings quite a bit of anxiety to my day-to-day thoughts. But stress and anxiety is bad for the fetus, according to all the pregnancy books I have read, so I usually try to put those worries off until I actually have to face them. I wish Carlisle was here to help me through this unusual situation- he's really the only doctor in the world who could comprehend the circumstances. I felt kicking for the very first time a little early in the pregnancy, but other than that everything has been progressing relatively normal. I have read that I should have a doctor or midwife scheduled for the delivery ahead of time, but I am scared that the delivery is going to reveal things about my world that other humans should not know.

I sigh and attempt to roll out of bed, but with my increasingly growing torso, it is no longer an easy task. I groan when I land back in my bed right where I started, failing to get up.

"Here goes round two…" I grunt practically launching myself off the bed. I smile when my feet successfully make it to the ground, and I rub my stomach. "We did it."

It's been close to two months since I last saw Jacob. Not of a lack of trying, but every time I try to see him or call him I somehow _just_ miss him. After the last day that I saw him, when he ask me to try to remember the story, I went online to look up old Quileute legends and found some really interesting information about wolves. I had even come across a blog about the _cold ones,_ but as I read the text of that blog I realized how inaccurate their information was. The author talked about vampires turning into smoke and ashes whenever the sun hit their skin, and how they only drink the blood of young beautiful women. Honestly, the blogger seemed to be taking a lot of information they got from movies and TV shows to _prove_ his evidence. I remember Jacob talking about how his tribe was descendants of wolves or something, but everything was kind of fuzzy. Call it pregnancy brain or whatever but for the life of me, I can't put anything together in ways that make sense. I really would just like to talk to Jacob about some of my hypotheses, but I can't get ahold of him, no matter how hard I try.

It's Saturday, and I am going to attempt one more time to catch him at home, despite all the other failed tries. It's a warm day, so even if I don't catch him a walk on the beach might be nice.

I take a quick shower, and then french braid my hair for the day- not in the mood for messing with it all day. I pull on a pair of maternity jeans, the soft elastic material clinging to my baby bump, and put on a plaid button up shirt big enough to button over my whole stomach. After slipping on a pair of sneakers, I go down to the kitchen to grab a poptart to eat while I drive down to La Push. Maybe if I get there early I can catch him before he leaves for the day.

Before I know it, I am pulling up in front of the familiar little house. As I am walking up to the front door I hear voices coming from the back of the house. Instead of knocking, I follow the voices, and as I get closer I notice that the voices are not talking, but shouting. As I come up to the corner, I peak around the edge of the house, and notice there are five men standing about two-hundred yards from here. I breathe quietly, trying to make out what they are saying.

"Jacob, be rational! She is just some pale face girl, whom you barely know!" One of the men shout. They all look so similar: very tall, muscular, and cropped black hair. Not only do they look physically similar, but they are wearing nearly identical clothes, or lack of. All of them are shirtless, barefoot, and wearing cutoff jeans. If they weren't so serious I would laugh, because they look like some kind of muscular boy-band.

"Don't talk about her like that! She is so much more than that!" a man that I now recognize as Jacob yells at other man.

"What? Are you in love with her or something? Did I miss the imprinting?" Another one of them laughs.

"Shut up, Paul." Another says. This one carries himself different from the others. He is slightly taller than the rest, but there is something about his stance that portrays dominance. He almost looks like the _adult_ of the group- the one that keeps everyone in check. "Everybody just calm down."

One of the men stands kind of to the back of the group, as if he isn't really part of the conversation, but close enough to look part of the group.

"She deserves to know, Sam! If she happens to see a gigantic wolf running around outside her window, she should know what the hell is going on! She _is_ the one that the bloodsucker wants!" Jacob shouts at man in charge, obviously named Sam. There are several words in what Jacob says that gets my blood to run cold. Wolves… Bloodsucker.

The one named Paul laughs again loudly. "He _is_ in love with her! I say we let the leech have her. The leech-lover isn't worth getting no sleep over."

Are they talking about me? They have to be.

At what Paul says something changes, but it could be my eyes playing tricks on me. But from where I am standing it looks like Jacob has began to shake violently. I begin to step forward, worried for my friend, but then the next thing I know the boy I call my friend is no longer standing there. With a loud ripping noise, Jacob's form shifts from man into some kind of animal… A _large_ animal. A wolf.

I see strands of blues fluttering through the air,and landing softly on the ground. I realize that the blue strands is what remains of Jacobs shorts. Before I have time to react, Paul has shifted into a giant wolf as well.

"Great." The one named Jared says, shaking his head.

My heart starts racing as I focus on the two giant wolves in front of me. The two wolves start circling each other, and loud snarls and grow louder as if they are shouting at one another. As I look at the two extraordinarily large wolves I notice their different features. The wolf known as Paul is mainly a pale grey with a almost white face, whereas Jacob is a brownish-russet color- similar to the color of his skin. Jacob is noticeably larger than Paul, but both are huge compared to the wolves than I saw at the zoo in Phoenix.

My mind is racing, and my stomach begins to do somersaults, my head beginning to spin. I grab onto the wood of the house to steady myself, but as I do that something happens. A piercingly loud snarl rips from one of the wolves, and Paul lunges at Jacob. Fear for my friend jolts through my body, and I hear a loud scream- my body going limp. The world slips away, and everything goes black.

"Bella, wake up." Someone says close to my ear. There is a light tapping on my cheek, something warm- a hand. I feel warm, too warm to be outside still. I slowly open my eyes, light streaming in through a window blinding me temporarily. I realize I am laying on a couch, and I open my eyes wider to examine the room. I look up and see Billy Black looking down worriedly at me. Behind him are two very large men, who I recognize from the fight earlier.

"Told you she wasn't dead." One of the men whispers. I looked closer at their faces and realized how young they really were. Despite their size they were closer to being boys than men.

The one I recognized as Jared shrugged and said, "She looked pale."

"Shut up, boys." Billy said, still looking intently at me. "Bella, hon, how are you feeling? Do you want some water?"

I just stare at him for one long moment before nodding. The unnamed boy left the room, most likely to fetch some water. I looked back at Billy, and almost croaked at him, "What happened?"

"You fainted, Princess." Jared answers. "We heard you scream for Jake and next thing you knew you hit the ground."

All of it comes rushing back to me- the arguing, the wolves, the brawl… I must have been the one that I heard scream. "Where is he?"

"Who, Jake?" He asks. "Probably getting his ass whooped by Paul."

The other boy enters the room, "Nah, man… I'm tellin' you. Jake could totally take Paul, easily."

They talk so casually about the fight between the two wolves, as if it is an everyday thing. But it looked to me like they were fighting to the death. The boy comes over to hands me the glass of water. I slowly pull myself up into a halfway sitting position, and smile smally and whisper, "Thanks."

He just smiles and turns to go back to where he was standing before.

"Should I call Charlie to come pick you up?" Billy asks.

Panic floods through me at the thought of not getting to make sure Jacob was okay. Also, it would be hard to explain why I had fainted in the first place, and why I was down here so early anyways. "No, no.. Please don't tell Charlie. I'm fine, I promise."

He raises his eyebrow at me, but nods. "Sure, sure."

I look over to the boys, inspecting them again. "So, are you wolf-boys too?"

They both laugh. Jared walks over to a reclining chair and plops down, and the other grabbed a kitchen chair to sit on.

Jared was the one to answer my question. "I don't know what you mean by _wolf-boys,_ but, yes, we are werewolves.

I nod as I process this information. Jacob was a werewolf. Well, of course he was a werewolf- why the hell wouldn't he be a werewolf? Seems like every other creature in my life is of mythical origin, so why not throw werewolves in there? I guess if Angela turns out to be a witch, she can join the club too.

"Well, technically we are _shapeshifters_ but werewolf works too." The nameless boy says.

"What do you mean?" I ask him.

Jared clears his throat. "Quil, do you think we should wait till Jake get back to fill in all the dirty details."

Ahh, Quil. I've heard Jake talk about him. I may even have met him once, but he's changed so much I wouldn't recognize him.

He shrugs. "I don't see why, she asked."

"Whatever, man." Jared says, and gets up to roam into the kitchen. Moments later he re- emerges with a large bag of potato chips.

Quil continues, "We aren't technically werewolves. Werewolves only transform into wolves on a full moon, where we can shift anytime we want."

I nod, soaking in the information. I have so many more questions, but I want to ask them to Jake, knowing he will go into much more detail with me than Jared and Quil would. Up until recently Jake always seemed to tell me things uninhibited- not worried about how I would react.

Silence sinks in around us, everyone at a loss of words. Billy is still hovering near me in his wheelchair, looking at me like he is waiting for me to have a bad reaction to something. Like I am going to break into hysterics at any moment. Both boys look at me and I notice that every couple seconds their eyes flash down to my stomach. So many emotions play in their eyes in those brief seconds that they look at my stomach: confusion, anger, sadness… I start to feel a little self-conscious and my arms instinctively wrap protectively around my torso.

Quil clears his throat, "Bella, can I ask you a question? You don't have to answer."

I narrow my eyes at him for a second then say, "Let's hear it."

"Is it really the bloods-" Billy glares daggers in warning to the boy, and he immediately changes his sentence. "Are you really pregnant with _his_ baby?"

I sigh. "Yes, I am."

It is Jared now who responds to me. "How is that even possible? Aren't they like… dead?"

I can't help it, but I let out a small laugh. It shocks me that I am able to laugh at any mention of Edward. Hopefully that is a good thing. "I don't think of them as dead, but your guess is as good as mine. I have no idea."

All of them nod as they take in what I say.

"But that means that you had to-" Quil cuts off. "Ew."

I snort. Apparently having sex with a vampire is not number one on any of these werewolves lists of things to do. If only they knew how beautiful it really was. "Well, I guess we all have our opinions."

"I'll say." Jared amends.

Silence falls among the four of us again, but is quickly interrupted by laughing and soon the front door swings open. Three more large men enter the tiny living room, and if I was claustrophobic it would have been an issue. The three men smile at each other as if nothing went down between them, as if the last half hour did not happen.

Jacob weaves his way through the other boys and comes to plop down on the couch next to me. He throws one of his giant arms over my shoulder and pulls me into a tight embrace. I hadn't realized I had been cold until Jacob's warmth encapsulates me. Though he was so warm, that I knew that only in a couple minutes I would get too hot.

I look up at him, his arm still around me. "So, you're a werewolf."

A crooked smile stretches across his face.

"Pretty cool, huh?"

I laugh. "Pretty cool. I have a lot of questions though, and you are going to answer each and every one."

He chuckles, and reaches his other hand around to pat my head. "Sure, sure."

Someone clears their throat, and I realize that Jacob and I had been acting as if no one else was in the room. We were very affectionately embracing one another, and it seems that the other wolves a little confused and uncomfortable.

"Bella-" Sam says, his face serene yet authoritative. "It is nice to finally meet you, my name is Sam. We have heard a lot about you."

I raise my eyebrow at Jacob and he ducks his head, a small blush filling his cheeks. "It's nice to meet you too."

Sam begins gesturing to the other boys in the room. "This is Quil, Jared, and Paul."

"Nice to meet you." My eyes linger on Paul, and a small shudder runs through my body as I remember him lunging at Jacob with his teeth barred. He seems to notice my eyes on him, and gives me a small smirk. I quickly look away, and I know that my face must be red from my ever present blush.

Sam clears his throat, and is looking directly at me, but then his eyes flicker down to my stomach. "Now, Bella, it seems that we have an issue-"

"Sam, don't you think we can do this later?" Jacob asks, cutting Sam off. "I think I should talk to Bella before anything."

What could they be talking about? What kind of issue do I have with a bunch of werewolves?

Sam narrows his eyes at Jake, but then nods. "Fine, but we need we can't push off this conversation long, Jacob."

Jake nods.

"Why don't you bring her to tonight's bonfire and we can discuss things then?" Sam purposes.

"I think that is up to Bella, don't you think?" Billy chimes in.

"Of course, I apologize." Sam says, realizing he was talking as if I was not here. "Would you like to join us for a bonfire tonight?"

I look at Jacob for reassurance, and he smiles. "It will be fun, Bella. There will be food, and you can hear some of our stories."

"And the _issue?"_ I ask.

"It won't take long, I promise." Jacob says.

I narrow my eyes at him for a long minute, and he gives me a reassuring smile as if telling me _everything's okay._ I look back at Sam and around at the group of very large boys quickly, and then nod. "I'll have to call Charlie and tell him I'll be home late tonight, though."

I glance at Jacob and see a beaming smile across his face, and a pang of guilt rips through me as I remember what Paul had said right before him a Jacob had fought.

" _He is in love with her…"_

I shouldn't lead him on, it's not right. Jacob and I can never happen- I can't see myself _ever_ being in a relationship with anyone again after Edward. It wouldn't be fair to them… I'd always be pining after a man that didn't love me. I can never be a good companion to anyone. I realized soon after finding out about the baby that it would always just be me and him. I couldn't see myself raising him with anyone besides Edward, and I know that will never happen. Jacob is so young and kind, and I know that he would be a good father someday, but I couldn't do that too him. Damn him to a lifetime with a woman who would never truly belong to him. My heart sinks, and I know what the right thing to do is, but it also doesn't feel right. I haven't spent much time with him, but there is something about him, something almost magnetic about him- I can't be away from him too long. He has become so important to me over the last couple weeks, and it scares me. As I look into his eyes now I can see how painful these past months apart have been for him as well. So wrong.

I can never be his.

Soon after the other boys decided they were ready for some real food and mentioned something about raiding Emily's fridge, they took off leaving just Jake, Billy and I. Jake and I walked on the beach for a couple hours- him answering each question I had. For a while we just sat looking out at the ocean, letting the silence fill each of us. Sometimes there doesn't need to be constant conversation in a good friendship. I know Jake hopes that someday that this will develop into a romantic relationship, and soon I am going to have to address that issue, but for now I choose to live in denial.

My stomach started rumbling and Jake let out a loud laugh and decided it was time to get me some food. He mentioned a small burger shack just down the road, and said that it would be his treat, but I have no intention of letting him pay for my meal.

I ordered a bacon, avocado burger with fries, while Jake ordered half the menu- double cheeseburger, fries, onion rings, milkshake and a soda. I had laughed at his order, wondering how he could possibly eat all of that, but he took that as a challenge and ordered chili-cheese fries and jalapeno poppers as well.

Now we wait for our food, joking and carrying on a light conversation.

"Oh, hey Jake." a woman's voice says, holding a large brown bag, full of what I assume to be greasy diner food. I gasp quietly when I see her face- a beautiful young face but one side covered in a long, wide deep scar, pulling down the corner of her mouth despite the smile on her face. She has sleek, long black hair that falls to her waist, and beautiful brown eyes- almost black. I stare at her for a long moment, and then quicking fix my gaze on the bag of food that she holds in her arms.

"Hey, Em. Have you met Bella?" Jake asks, gesturing to me.

She continues to smile, but a flicker of recognition crosses her eyes. "No, not yet. Hi, I'm Emily."

"This is Sam's fiancee I was telling you about." He adds.

I nod, and smile. "Ah, you're the wolf girl."

She laughs. "I guess that would make you the vampire girl."

Pain sears through my chest at her words, but I try to keep a cool smile on my lips. "Used to be anyways."

Her eyes flicker down to my stomach, and I expect for the sad look in her eyes that the rest of her tribe seem to give me when they look at me, but it doesn't come. "Congratulations, when are you due?"

"June second." I say.

"Oh, wow. Coming up soon, I guess." she says.

I laugh nervously, and run my hand over my bump. "Don't remind me. I'm not even slightly prepared."

She smiles. "I'm sure you will be just fine. But if you ever need any help with anything I would be happy to help."

Tears spring to my eyes at her kindness, but I blink them away quickly, attributing my sudden emotion to pregnancy hormones.

"Thank you, I'd like that."

She shrugs, and looks back at Jake. "Well, I better get home before a house full of hungry oversized boys destroy my house."

"Good luck with that." Jake laughs.

"It was nice to meet you Bella."

"It was nice to meet you too."

She nods and turns to walk out of the small restaurant. I watch her walk down the road with her bag of food in her arms until I can't see her anymore. At one point she must have been quite beautiful. She still is, but the scar that covers half of her face mars that beauty just a bit.

I look back at Jake, and he is watching out the window as well. He sees me looking at him and turns to look at me again.

"She was nice." I say.

"Yeah, Emily's great."

I battle inside myself, wanting to ask what happened to her face, but wondering if that was too personal of a question. Jake _did_ say he would answer anything.

"So…" I begin, a blush creeping into my cheeks.

"What happened to Emily's face?" He finishes for me.

I laugh, "How did you know?"

"You're pretty easy to read."

I sigh, "So I've heard."

He takes a deep breath, and turns his head to look out the window again, as if he can't look me in the eyes as he tells me this story. "Remember how I told you that at first shifting is hard to control? If we get angry, we can lose control?"

I nod.

"Well, one day, Sam lost it and Emily was standing too close." he says, sadness seeping into his voice. "It just added to one of the many reasons Sam hates himself. He hates that he did that to her."

A weight lands on my chest at the realization that her fiance did that, imagining the loathing I would have for myself if I had been the one to do that to someone I loved. It would be hard to forgive yourself. But it wasn't something that could control, and she clearly hasn't held it against him if she is still willing to marry him.

"Why else does he hate himself?" I ask.

He narrows his eyes and purses his lips and I can see the battle in his mind whether or not to tell me.

"Tell me, please?" I ask, putting my hand on his.

He looks down at my hand and before I can pull it away he flips his hand over and he winds his fingers through mine.

He lets out a sigh, and looks at me pointedly. "If I tell you you have to listen to the _whole_ story before you come to judgments. Promise?"

"Promise." I say, putting my free hand on the table, holding out my pinky. He wraps his large linky around mine and he laughs.

"So, several years ago Sam was dating a girl named Leah- you might have met her before. Leah Clearwater?"

I nod, remembering all the times that Charlie and Harry had shoved us together, trying to get us to play together while they went fishing. A friendship never really bloomed, both of us being too shy.

"Well, things were pretty serious. Everyone thought that they would eventually get married and have kids and live happily ever after. Life had other plans." He whispers, a bit of bitterness seeping into his voice. "When we change, it is like our whole chemistry changes an things happen that cannot be reversed. Leah was really worried about Sam, she didn't know what was going on. He had disappeared for weeks, and when he had finally came home he was acting different. It scared her, but he couldn't tell her. Anyways, they continued to date for a while, things were strained but they loved each other and they were both determined to make it work. Well, one weekend Leah's cousin Emily came to visit from college-"

I gasp. "Her cousin? How could Emily-"

He lets go of my hand and reaches across the table to cover my mouth. "Let me finish the story. You promised, remember?"

I roll my eyes, pull his hand from my mouth, and dramatically zip my lips and throw the key over my shoulder. He laughs but continues his story.

"You see, when Sam saw Emily for the first time it was like his whole world shifted around her. She was now the center of his universe… It was no longer gravity that held him to the earth but _her_. It's called imprinting- the only way I could describe it is like _soulmates_."

I raise my eyebrows at the word, but continue my silence.

"He didn't have a choice, it is just who he is. It's not something one can ignore."

Sadness rises in my chest for Leah, knowing the feeling of losing the person that you thought was the one. But to have to watch, be _related_ to the girl who took the love of your life away. Unbearable.

Jake shrugs, and looks up expectantly as the waitress brings our food to the table, and I decide to let it go. Leave the past in the past.

The rest of our meal remains lighthearted as we talk about school, and the antics of his pack. Some of the stories he tells of the other wolves are very entertaining, and I become almost jealous of the camaraderie and brotherhood he has become a part of. To have so many care about you and love you- I thought I would have that once. Hopefully, that family doesn't slip away from him so easily. After a good five minutes of discussing who was paying the bill, we decided to go dutch and started making our way back to his house.

"I'm glad I know." I whisper, looking down, watching my steps.

A smile in his voice, "You don't know how happy I am that you know."

We walk in silence for a couple minutes, and as the house comes into view, I start to remember tribe event I have agreed to go to tonight. My stomach clenches uneasily, and my palms start to sweat. I clear my throat, trying to push the nervousness out of my voice, "So, what does Sam want to talk to me about."

I look over at him, and his brows furrow and sighs, "It's no big deal, don't worry about it."

I narrow my eyes at him, but he doesn't look at me, and I know that it is certainly something I _should_ be worried about. His reaction only encourages uneasiness, but I decide to let it go for now. Maybe I can come up with a reason why I can't attend. Although, I don't take this as a subject the Sam is going to allow me to ignore forever.

We make it to my truck, and we stop, not directly looking at each other.

"I need to go home and do some things before tonight," I say.

He looks at me, and smiles lightly. He pulls me into a tight hug, and whispers in my ear, "Don't worry, everything is fine. I promise."

I pull away, and force a smile on my face, "Sure."

"Be back at eight, we will head over together." He say.

"Alright."

I turn away from him, and yank the cab door open and climb in not so gracefully. He back up slightly as the engine roars to life, and waves. I just smile, and throw the truck into reverse. I glance one more time at him, wanting to see a glimpse of that carefree boy I used to know, but see the darker, sadder man that has replaced my Jacob.


	5. Chapter 5

**I know, I know... It has been a while. I have been so distracted as of late, but hopefully I can pull it together enough to finish this story (but I am not making any hard and fast promises). I guess I lost interest in it for a short while, and maybe struggled with some writers block, but I got some inspiration.**

 _ ***Disclaimer: As always, all characters belong to the one and only, Stephanie Meyers. Just the adaptation of the story is mine, but she can have that too if she wants.**_

My truck rumbles to a halt exactly where I had been park just a couple hours ago. My stomach has been trying to escape my body in nervous turns my whole drive here. My hands are sweating, and I rub them on my jeans a couple of times, and take a deep breath.

 _Tap, tap, tap!_

I shriek, and whip my body toward the sound bouncing off my drivers-side window. And there stands Jacob with a mischievous grin plastered on his face. I scowl at him and dramatically press the lock down on the door.

"You know I could just rip the door open, right?" He asks, jokingly.

I stick my tongue out at him, but open the door to get out, but Jacob stops me.

"Just move over, I'll drive your truck to where we are meeting."

"It's not going to be here?" I ask.

He smiles, and pushes me over effortlessly, and slides in. "What is a bonfire without the beach?"

"What about your dad?"

"He's already there, Sam picked him up a little bit ago." He says, turning the truck on.

We drive in silence, and I look out the window, watching the trees fly by, remembering my first time riding piggyback on Edwards back, and how nauseous I felt afterward. Our first kiss…

 _Ow._ I clutch my chest, wincing.

Five minutes later we are pulling next to a much newer blue truck, and my monster rumbles to a stop. Jacob hops out his door and jogs around to my side to open my door for me, and help me out. I smile sheepishly up at him as I slide to the ground, and topple a little. He catches my arm and stabilizes me.

"I don't know how you survive with balance like yours."he muses.

My smile slips from my face as my mind drifts to the last person who said that to me.

"I guess it takes supernatural strength to keep me safe," I mumble, looking down at my shoes.

"The meeting is up the trail a little, you okay to walk?"

I roll my eyes, and start trudging up the trail, ignoring his comment. With two strides he catches up to where I am, and chuckles quietly. After a couple more feet I start to hear booming laughter, and loud conversation. We walk around a bend and then a bright, large bonfire appears a couple hundred feet away. Shadowed bodies shuffle around the fire, some sitting, others perching on what appears to the edge of the cliffs a couple yards from the fire. The scent of hotdogs being roasted over a flame wafts in our direction. The familiar scent reminds me of the few times Charlie attempted to take me camping. It usually ended with an injury of some sort. He quickly realized I was not much of a camper.

"Jake!" Someone shouts as we come closer to the bonfire. A boy, well, boy being relative compared to his size, jogs to us and punches Jake in the shoulder. "You better get to the hotdogs soon, Paul has eaten five, and hasn't shown any signs of letting up. There might not be much left."

Jake laughs, but speeds up his pace slightly, and I practically jog to keep up with him.

"You're Bella, right?" The boy asks me, a large smile plastered across his face. He has slightly longer hair than the other boys, but the same ink black color. I look at him and try to figure out how old he is, but between the size and the way he carries himself it is hard to tell. I would guess younger than Jake and the others, maybe fourteen or fifteen?

I smile back, "Yeah, an you are?"

"Seth." he says and extends his hand for me to shake.

I take his hand and shake it, happy that someone here seems excited to meet me. He is definitely the most friendly werewolf I have met today. Jake plows into a cooler and pulls out three hot dogs, spears them on a stick and begins spinning it over the fire. It amazes me that he is hungry again after the lunch we had. Seth wanders off, going to talk to someone else I presume, and I walk over and take a seat on a log a couple feet from the fire. The heat radiates toward me and warms my bones, it feels nice. No many people notice that me and Jake joined the gathering. A couple of the boys I met earlier wave, but continue with the activities they were doing before we got here. On the other side of the fire I see Billy rolling up, Sam, the leader, walking next to him.

"Hello, Bella." both men say, and Billy pulls his chair a few feet from me, and Sam sits on the log on the other side of Billy.

My stomach clenches, and I know that it is time to have the conversation I have been dreading all afternoon. Jacob sees them approach and surprisingly abandons his food to come sit directly next to me, our arms touching.

"We thought it best to have the conversation sooner than later so that we can get it out of the way." Billy says, and Sam nods.

I take a deep, shaky breath and nod, signaling for them to begin the discussion.

Sam clears his throat, "So, it is to our understanding that Edward Cullen is the father of your child, am I correct?"

I wince at the name, but try to say as firmly as possible, "Yes, he is."

"You see, it is our duty to protect humans from harm, and I don't know how much about the treaty we had with the Cullen's you were informed of." He continues. "But this is an unprecedented situation, something that none of us thought possible. You have to understand that the unknowns when it comes to the birth of this child is a worry for us."

"It's just a baby." I say.

"Can you assure us that this child will be no harm to humans? How much of the child's genetics are going to take after it's father?" Sam says, his brow furrowing.

"I don't know what you want from me," I say, shaking my head.

Billy steps in, "Well, first we want to ask if it has been a relatively normal pregnancy? When you go to your doctors appointments, were there any anomalies?"

I look down, not wanting to give them the real answer, because I am afraid of how they will react. I run my fingers over my belly, and sit quietly for a couple seconds, pondering the best way to answer their question.

I sigh, "I don't know. I have not been to the doctor since I first found out."

It's quiet, no one says anything for a long while.

Finally Jacob chimes in, "Why not?"

I bite my lip and look over at him. "In case there were any issues… I didn't want to expose anything that is not mine to expose."

"So you worry about the genetics of the child as well?" Billy asks.

I glance over at him. "No, not worry. There are things that I have promised to keep a secret and if there is a chance that too much can be revealed, then I don't want to chance it. Yes, the baby may take after his father, but that is _my_ information."

"Unfortunately, it is not just your information. The outcome of your pregnancy will impact all the people around you. It could be dangerous."

"It's a baby. How the hell could it be dangerous?" I ask, anger seeping into my voice now.

"It's not purely human. It could be a risk for all of us." Sam says, authority deep in his voice.

"So, what do you think I should do about it, then? Clearly you have big ideas, even though you know less about my child and it's genetics than I do?"

Jake puts his hand on my shoulder, trying to calm me, and gives Sam a warning glance.

"We know more than you think." Sam offers.

"Really? So you know Edward and his family personally? You have spent enough time with them to really get to know them? You know more than I do when it comes to my baby's father? Interesting."

"That's not what he is saying. He just means that because of the tendencies of their type, there are not only risks for you but for everyone." Billy says in a calming tone.

I close my eyes, and try to take some calming breaths before continuing the conversation. "Listen, yes, I know very little about what characteristics that my child will manifest, but so far, the pregnancy has been nothing but normal. I don't think there is anything for your tribe to worry about just yet."

"It is good to hear that is has been a normal pregnancy, it helps. However, we take human life very seriously, and we do everything in our power to assure that our people are safe from such dangers." Billy says, his tone quiet, but firm.

Jake clears his throat, and everyone turns to look at him. "Well, I was just thinking doesn't Sue Clearwater have experience with pregnancy and stuff? She already knows about the supernatural side of our world… Since Bella isn't seeing a doctor, she could go see Sue."

"You are not suggesting that we put Sue in that kind of danger, are you?" Sam asks, skepticism thick in his words.

"What danger? One of us could always be there, just in case… And besides. It is after all a _baby_. I think I could manage that on my own." Jacob says. "Then, Sue can help us have the information we need, and Bella can get advice from someone who understands the ups and downs of pregnancy, and can help her."

"It isn't a bad idea. She is a midwife for most of the women on the rez. She could be a good asset for us." Billy encourages.

"We will have to talk to her and see if she willing to get involved." Sam says, but I can tell he is still not thrilled at the idea.

"Does anyone want to hear what I want?" I ask, annoyed at the small group talking as if I was not involved.

"Of course." Billy says.

"If my baby is such a danger to your tribe, why would you offer a tribe member up to be my midwife? I do not agree that my baby is dangerous, but I also do not understand the line of thinking."

"If Sue is your midwife, then she will be able to give us answers that you do not have because you haven't been to the doctor throughout your pregnancy." Jacob says.

"And what if I don't want you to have that information?" I ask.

Jacob grabs my hand and squeezes it reassuringly, "Wouldn't it be nice to know what is going on with your little _worm_? We don't need to know personal stuff, we just want to make sure you are progressing along normally."

I smile at his use of my word for the baby. "What kind of information would she be able to give me?"

All three men shift uncomfortably, and Jacob shrugs.

"I don't think any of us know much about pregnancy and birth, Bells. I don't know what she will have to say, but it's better than nothing, right?" Jacob asks, still holding my hand in his large, overly warm ones.

It would be nice to get some information. It isn't going to be as helpful as if Carlisle was here, but I guess it is the next best thing. I don't this Sue, but it seems that she knows something of the supernatural. She might not be able to do a sonogram, but it would be nice to ask someone my questions. In a way, it is kind of nice that it is a woman. As much as I wish it was Carlisle that was here to help me through this pregnancy, it would have been beyond awkward for him to deliver the baby.

I sigh, and look at the fire for a moment before answering, "Okay, fine. But there has to be conditions."

"Like?" Jake asks.

"My personal, bodily information stays between me and this Sue. You mentioned having one of you there, and the only person I would be slightly okay with being there is Jacob. And thirdly, he cannot be there for any… Exams." I say.

Billy nods, and Sam frowns slightly at the last part, probably disturbed at the fact that Sue will be unprotected.

"That sounds fair," Jacobs says resolutely.

Everyone nods in agreement. Sam gets up and walks over to where Emily is sitting across the fire from us, and Billy wheels away to go talk to one of the oversized boys.

"Well, that went… As good as expected, I guess." Jacob chuckles.

"Yes, although, God knows why the hell werewolves would want to sit through my vaginal exams." I say sarcastically.

"Gross, don't say vaginal." He shudders dramatically and makes a face.

I laugh, "Oh honey, if you are going to a midwife with me, you are going to have to get used to the word _vaginal_ , along with many others."

"Sure, sure." He mumbles, but smiles brightly.

The night passed quickly- Eventually Sam called everyone together to listen to the tribes history. The stories were magical, and I wondered how many legends in our world stemmed from true stories. I found myself curled up next to Jacob, his arms wrapped protectively around me. I spent most of the night, my ear pressed against his chest, listening to the thud of his heartbeat. I remember in and out of sleep at times, and the stories being told took on dream qualities, but then Jake would shake me awake at the important parts of the story. Sometimes his hand would drop to feel my stomach, and it was like the baby knew and kicked against his hand.

Before I knew it, Jacob was pulling me to my feet, and half carrying me back to the truck.

"I'm going to drive you home." He says.

"How are you going to get home?" I ask, leaning up against the window of the truck.

He takes his eyes off the road for a moment, a look of worry etching his expression. He then sighs, and looks back at the road.

"I'll run home."

I snort and look at him. "You are going to run all the way from my house to La Push."

He laughs, "When you are a werewolf, it really isn't that far. Maybe a five minute run."

"Oh." I say, a little dazed.

He smiles and reaches across the cab to grab my hand. Guilt wracks through my body briefly, knowing that every time I let him hold my hand, he gets more of the idea that him and I could be together. But the other part of me battled my more logical side. I wanted him to hold my hand, it felt nice. It felt right. Not in the same way I felt when Edward would hold my hand. When edward held my hand it was like an extension of myself, but with Jacob… It was like for once I could pretend like there wasn't a crucial part of my soul missing.

"You know, we haven't been around each other a lot, but it feels like I have known you my whole life." he muses softly.

He is right. We have only hung out what, twice now? But it feels like he has been here all along. Our friendship comes so easily, it's like breathing. You don't have to think about it, it just has always happened, and you don't doubt your ability to breathe.

"Yeah, it seems that was, doesn't it?" I say.

Too soon we are pulling up in front of my house and the truck rumbles off. We sit in silence for a minute or so, a comfortable silence.

"Hey, Bella-" He begins, but then looks at me, and glances down at my hand resting gently where my baby lies. His expression changes into one of frustration, but then smooths into a controlled mask. A mask that I have started to recognize when he is trying to control his emotions. He sighs, and looks back out the windshield.

"I wish things were different, you know? I wish I had gotten to you first. Before _him."_

Ow. The pain in my chest ripples around the edges.

"Yeah, well I can't say I regret anything. I wouldn't have this baby that I love so much if it weren't for _him_."

His face wrinkles, and I think I spot sadness in his expression. "Yeah, I knew you would say that."

We both sigh in unison, and both laugh a little at our synchrony.

He looks out the drivers window, and then looks at me. "I have to go, Bella."

"Okay." I whisper.

He opens his door and hops out. He jogs around the front of the car to open the door for me and help me wobble out of the truck. He holds onto my hand and starts walking me up the walkway to the front door, our arms swinging between us. When we make it on to the porch, he turns us so we are face-to-face, and then pulls me into a tight hug.

"Thank you for tonight," I mumble into his shirt.

He leans back slightly, and I suddenly realize how close his face is to mine at the moment, and a palpable tension fills the air between us. I stare up at him, lost for words, not wanting to deny him and hurt him, but knowing that this isn't a step I am ready to take. He starts to lean in slowly, and before I know it I am leaning away.

"I'm sorry, Jake. I can't." I whisper, tears springing to my eyes.

He sighs and lets go of me and steps back. His dark eyes hard, rejected. He stares at me for a long moment before saying, "I have to go."

Before I get a chance to say anything else, he leaps off the porch and b-lines for the forest edge and disappears. I can't stop the tears that flow down my cheeks now. I stare after him, wanting so bad to be able to chase after him, and demand that he talk to me, but here I am. Pregnant, weak and human. I want so badly to be able to be what he needs, to be the girl he will spend his life with. But every fiber in my body knows that it just cannot happen, not now. Not with Edward's child growing inside of me. May another lifetime it could have been me and Jacob. Maybe I could have been Jacob's girl, but after Edward- I can never be fully Jacob's. He deserves better than that.

I can never be what he needs. He needs someone like Emily. Someone who can give him happiness, a future, children- Whatever he wanted. But that wasn't me. He hated the existence of my child's father. His existence is why I stand here today. I would have been dead is it wasn't for Edward. Pulverized by Tyler Crowley's van months ago. But all Jacob and his pack can see is the bad in the existence of vampires. They didn't get to see all the good that came from his family. Carlisle and Esme were so undeniably good, I couldn't imagine two better people on this planet. Edward was in a totally different category of good. He was so selfless, wonderful and amazing in every way. I only hope that our child will possess all of his wonderful qualities. But the Quileutes do not see the Cullen's for who they were, they are so blinded by hate that they don't pause to see the beautiful.

Just that polar opposite view of the Cullen's is enough to not allow Jacob and I to be anything more than just friends. Because that vampire family is so much a part of who I am, and who my child is.

 **Okay then! So that is the 5th chapter of this fanfic... I know some of you had expressed that you didn't want this to be a Bella x Edward love story, and I still haven't 100% decided where I want this story to go. But I will figure it out. I hope you all stick around to see.**

xoxo


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